This is definitely one of the harder things I have gone through in a long time. Last week I came home from class, and was just sad. I walked up to Spencer, I hugged him and I said, "I have no purpose. I have no reason to get out of bed... I need a purpose" Spencer hugged me and told me he would be my purpose. I told him that it wouldn't work because he made me want to stay in bed and cuddle with him...so he said he would be my porpoise. He'd be cute and make me giggle. He is my porpoise.
I took a week away from this blog. I needed the time to gather my thoughts, to prepare my resume and to begin the search for a new job. So far I have sent out around 25-30 applications. Some of them I fit the qualifications for perfectly and some are a bit more of a stretch but I don't see the point in not trying. As Spencer's sister so eloquently put it I'm "so positive that rainbows could fly out of my ass in a hurricane". Pretty vivid imagery, but I don't see the point in not reaching out and pushing my own potential.
Life has hit me down many times, and each time I tell myself that things could never be worse. That the world is ending, and my life has officially gone down the crapper... but each time I persevere and in the end everything works out better than I imagined it could. I know that this time it will be the same.
♥ I want to keep exercising. I took the last week off, but I plan to jump right back in today. There is no point in sitting on my butt and putting all of my hard work to shame.
♥ I am going to work ahead and finish all of my schoolwork early. Get a jumpstart on the semester and pour my heart into it to get my well deserved A.
want to read all of the books i've been putting off. Angels & Demons, the Time Traveler's Wife, the His Dark Materials series.... I want to read.
♥ I want to run the dogs. Play with them. Train them.
♥ I want to lay outside in the sun and enjoy the coming spring days.
♥ I want to prepare wonderful and healthy lunches for myself. To love the ingrediants, to savor the smells.
♥ I want to dance. I want to be happy. I want to run.
Things are looking up. Just this morning I won the beautiful Kelly Moore Camera Bag from the Brightside Project. Now I just need to choose my color!