The End

Today is the last day of my unemployment.

 and the beginning of the next big step in my life.

It's the last day of having that nagging feeling in my stomach, of feeling stress hitting me from all sides, and also of sleeping in and relaxing around the house. I've really enjoyed what these past 10 months have allowed me to do. I've spent more time with my husband, i've spent days lounging around with my fur-babies and i've learned a lot about myself. I've re-discovering my love of reading and let the written word take me away to a different place each week. I changed my body, and became a stronger leaner person. I celebrated the joy of accomplishing small goals for myself. I danced around the living room while no one was watching. I took time to reconnect with old friends and made time for the friends I have. I got married, and had a beautiful wedding.

While this past year may have been one of the hardest, and most stressful, in my life...I have never felt more liberated. I feel like I could take on the world. I have more confidence and feel so much better about the person I am. I think everyone hits that moment once or twice in life when they start to doubt what they know and what they have to offer. I went through this, and came up feeling better than when I went in.

Thank you to all of my readers, old and new. You have been an amazing sounding board, and filled me with so much motivation and confidence. I hope I get the opportunity to meet many of you over the coming year. Check back later for a special giveaway to thank you all for everything!

♥

Jenni

PS- I will be in Houston, Texas at the beginning of February! 

Good News and stuff!

I have gotten some amazing news these past few days!

First, I won a BEAUTIFUL new pajama set on the Brightside Project!

A beautiful cami and pajama set will be arriving at my house soon from 

Between the Sheets, a luxury lingerie line! (mine will be midnight black with lilac ribbon and lace!)

Then I had FEMA drop by our house! The president may declare my area a natural disaster area! Which means, we could end up getting the difference back between what our actual loss was, and what we got back from insurance. My policy only covered 5k, and the damage to the property, not including personal property items we lost, got up to 7k! So cross your fingers that the president decides we suffered enough damage to get government help! (There are quite a few apartment buildings, and businesses down the street that had to be closed down and re-habbed due to the flooding.)

And yesterday I went shopping for shoes for the wedding! After a LONG day, and lots of sale shopping we almost give up hope! Then we found these....

They are from Nina, and a light gold color. I think they should look really pretty with my dress! Although, I am keeping the receipt until I get to try on my gown for the first time! (which is tomorrow morning at 9:30am!!!) I can not wait!!!! It's going to be so beautiful!!! 

 I am officially down 10 lbs and 2 dress sizes! It's frustrating to not see the numbers changing too quickly, but I know its because i'm gaining a lot of muscle, and that weighs a lot more than fat! Here's a photo of my face a good 2 months ago....

and here's one from this morning... excuse the no make-up and hair pulled back. haha

Not a HUGE difference, but I feel like my face looks much much thinner..and not quite so round! haha. I feel so much better. There are a lot of clothes that I haven't fit into in quite sometime, if ever, and everything looks and feels amazing! I have really made dedication and i'm glad its paying off. 6 of my lbs. lost have been in the last 3 weeks, with a steady 2 lbs. each week. It feels pretty amazing I have to say! If anone is having trouble losing, I can not recommend P90x enough! Its amazing, and I have never felt in better shape. I highly highly recommend it! Just make sure you are ready for the commitment, and not just starting out on a weight-loss journey. If you aren't prepared and in good shape already you will not be able to handle this workout and be very tempted to stop doing it. If you are in fairly good shape (can do a good 5-10 pushups in a row, don't get winded walking up a few stairs, and can do a good 25 sit-ups without stopping you should be able to handle this workout...just keep going. You will see results!)

Other than my dress fitting this weekend, i'm hoping to write a good 3 papers for my class and pull ahead of things a bit. It's been difficult to keep up with this summer class with everything I have going on in my life. Honestly, I will just be happy to pass the class and I wish I could take it pass/fail. I'm taking the fall semester off and I can't wait until the end of this month and my long 5 month break! It works out really well to take a break right now as well because I will be exactly halfway toward my masters degree! I'm taking it off for the wedding, but it's nice that it is working out this way. 

AND last but not least... Happy Birthday mom!!!

 

This photo was from my sisters wedding a few years ago. I'm on the left and mom is on the right

We have a pretty strong family resemblance!

We'll be celebrating the first weekend in August by taking a boat out on the lake and having a nice dinner. We always combine her birthday, and mine (July 24th) because they are so close together.

Hope everyone has a beautiful weekend!!!

♥

Jenni

PS- Thank you to my dear, sweet Summer who sent me a beautiful card today, after a particularly hard day on Monday. Love ya lady!

Smiling

It's been a long 3 months.

I have struggled through a lot of personal issues

and physical issues...

but today, I am finally smiling again.

via

The past few days have been amazing.

I have begun doing something to regulate my hormones

and for the first time in almost 2 years

I don't have 100 voices in my head at one time.

I was in fact able to turn my brain off the other day

to think of nothing...

other than the feel of my muscles as I glided through the water

during my daily swim.

That may not seem like a large feat

but for me, it is.

The past two years I have been a mess

unable to stop thinking

unable to relax.

My muscles were in a constant state of being constricted

and it was sometimes hard to breathe.

Now that i've gotten my stress under control,

my weight has started dropping quickly.

All of those months of going to the gym 

working my butt off...

I just needed the stress to dissapear

so my body could work the way it needed to.

The past week my days have been filled with:

* A healthy breakfast

* P90x! Yes, I started it this week...and I am FEELING it...but it feels AMAZING!

* A little healthy snack

* A 60+ minute swim (about 50 laps)

* A shower

* Photo editing

* Watching Royal Pains...I can't believe i've never watched it before! Love it!

I feel amazing.

I still have a lot to worry about

but I find myself feeling good

I'm able to relax, enjoy my day and see the world around me 

a little bit differently...

It's amazing how hormones can really mess you up!

I am STRONG. I am INVINCIBLE. I am POWERFUL!

No matter what happens next...

I am ready!!!

Whats something you have done to help yourself relax?

♥
Jenni

Just breathe...

Sometimes when things seem grim, I stop and I remember the movie Ever After.

As she takes a step into the ballroom, knowing her life is about to change forever...

whispering the phrase "breathe...just breathe..."

If ever there was a movie more inspiring to live life

it would be this one.

Life has thrown me a few curveballs these past few months,

but I know years from now I will look back on this time and smile.

Smile because Spencer and I only grew stronger through it all.

Smile because it marks the beginning of a new relationship with my father.

Smile because it was a turning point in my life. A time where I began to let go of the past.

Smile because through it...we survived.

I know good things are coming...

Our insurance agent brought our first bought of good news in a long time.

As long as everything goes through, we are getting enough money to cover all damages.

No news on the job front yet, but at least I know im still in the running

Hopefully i'll know more next week

and if not...well, there's always tomorrow

and there's always another job.

Life is funny.

Sometimes you love it.

Sometime you hate it.

Sometimes  you wonder if it could possibly get worse.

but, thats life

and in the end...it's pretty wonderful.

This post is dedicated to a few amazing women

women whose blogs I read today

that reminded me of the beauties that surround us all.

Simone, who reminds me of "Happily Ever After" with her beautiful photos

Chloe, who is a never-ending example to keep the silly in your life, and love will persevere

Micaela, for her amazing outlook and hope in the face of pain

Tracy, for her beautiful wedding video, and a shining example of love

Annie, for introducing me to beautiful new music

Summer, for her friendship, love and amazing attitude. I'm so happy she got to go home.

Marian, for her engagement pictures. Never have I seen photos so personal. Such a sweet goofy love.

Belen, for her sweet disposition, encouraging words and lovely attitude.

and last but not least...

Rasha, for this quote, and her always inspiring words.

To all of you,
and anyone else who feels life is letting them down...
it's going to get better.

♥

Jenni

Happy Friday!!!

Life is BEAUTIFUL!

A lot has been going on lately!

I have been doing some freelance photography on the side,

and my nights have been filled with photo editing.

I started school this week which included reading, writing and planning.

AND

i've been reading the BEST book ever!

"Water for Elephants" by Sara Gruen is absolutely beautiful.

Every word draws me in a little futher, and I wish the book would never end.

It has truly been an absolute joy to read,

I never want to put it down.

Beautiful, eloquent and stunning

and for the big news...

I got called yesterday for interview #2!

The job is a Marketing Manager position

and I just feel like it would be an absolutely perfect fit.

I had my interview this morning,

and I just feel GOOD about it.

I haven't stopped smiling since I left.

Please cross your fingers and say a prayer for me!

The only sad part of my day is that I went for a swim...

and mid-swim something pulled the wrong way.

I'm in an insane amount of pain

and thinking that a hot bath will be needed in about 5 minutes.

Gah! I wish it would stop hurting!!!

Have a wonderful weekend!!!

♥

Jenni

Carpe Diem and loving life!

1... 2... 3...

The one thing that I have learned from this past weekend

is how much all of the little things don't matter.

I've been stressing myself out lately

thinking about my friends...new and old.

Stressing over how I have lost touch with some

and thinking maybe I did something wrong.

My close friends have recently told me i'm "so nice"

and sweet and wouldn't harm a fly...how I am an inspiration...

but everytime I heard it, I would doubt myself. 

I would thank them for their kind words, 

and in the back of my head I would scoff at the remarks

and not be able to believe the words that they said are true.

Overall i've been down

and all of it has been sitting in my head and making me miserable.
Friends I lost, words that were said, actions that were made...

but ever since last Thursday night, none of that has mattered.

I have never been more content

Those people that have hurt me, I am finally ready to let go of

I know that in the past things happen than we can't change

but I shouldn't be focusing on it 4 years later

worried about what they still think of me.

What does it matter?

Why should I care?

This is a time in my life to worry about myself.

To get healthy, to grow, to make friends and expand my wings.

To try out new things, like books and recipes and activites.

To make a healthy change in my life

and finally fully focus on working out AND eating healthy

not just working out, and then coming home to fried food and ice cream....

or both in one with some fried ice cream!

If my little Mia,

can come back from the cusp of death

To win the battle for her life, when the doctors couldn't even find out what was wrong.

To do all of that in only 3 days time,

and on the 4th day come home to run outside

breath in the fresh air, chase the birds, run after the squirrels

and wag her tail in the sunshine...

I can finally turn my life around.

I can lose the weight.

I can feel beautiful again.

I can focus on my studies and keep pulling my grades up (3.75 so far)

I can read a new book

I can learn a new trick

and I can let go of the past

Embrace my friendships

Love my family

Adore every moment with my amazing fiance

Fall in love more each and every single day.

I am a nice person.

I am a creative person.

I am a catch.

And that is my new personal mantra.

A sign to say to myself each day.

A message to let yesterday roll off

and embrace today with my head held high.

 

Last night, I ordered a new book called  

Naturally Thin: unleash Your SkinnyGirl

by Bethenny Frankel.

 I realize she may not be the guru of being healthy,

but i'm looking to the book for possible positive changes

small things I can do to make everything a little easier.

It came highly recommended from another blogger

(sorry I can't remember where I read it, if it was you THANK YOU!)

Im hoping it will be just that extra push I need...

and when i'm done reading it,

I may just pass it on so that it can bring some insight into one of your lives as well!

I am hoping to hear back about the interview 

I went on a week of so ago any day now.

Keep your fingers crossed for me.

But if it doesn't work out, I know another job will come along.

A positive attitude can move mountains.

This will pass and I will have an amazing career.

the perfect addition to my already amazing family and home.

Here's to today, tomorrow and the day after!

♥

Jenni 

PS- Last day to enter the giveaway! Enter by 7 p.m. central time tonight!

Greetings from Me to You!

Hi! I've missed you all!

With as much as i've been gone lately, you would think i've been on vacation! However, I am happy to say that life is finally getting caught up, things are getting tied in pretty little packages and placed out of sight and out of mind! To catch you all up this post is definitly going to have to be in the form of a list...so sit back, pop open a can of Dr. Pepper (I am obsessed with it lately!) and enjoy my tales of the last month!

♥ I finished up my semester from hell! Two classes seemed like it wouldn't be too difficult...little did I know the Creativity class I choose to take would consume my life, my thoughts and my passing moments for the next 4 months! 5 entire books later, 10 papers, a 12 page research paper and a bunch of random assignments thrown in last minute "for fun" and I am proud to say I have finished and am about to list all 5 of those books on Amazon over the next few days to get some cash back! My other class was a class in International marketing and I am so glad I took it! I learned some truly amazing information and my teacher was phenomenal. For my final project my group researched the Asian-American demographic in the beauty market and I have to say it was a very interesting project! Have you heard about O.P.I.'s new Hong Kong line?! The names of the polishes are actually putting a bad taste in some peoples mouths and they are viewing it as "a wee bit racist"

hmmmm You Red My Fortune Cookie?, Bling Dynasty?, Chop-Sticking to My Story? What do you think?
I loved the classes, but I am so happy to finally be done and have officially completed 5 of the 12 classes toward my masters Degree! This summer i'll be halfway done!!!


♥ I have been a reading machine lately and have read 5 books in the past few months! I had almost forgotten how much I love reading, and I would LOVE to start a book club with some ladies here in Kansas City. We could read books and then get together to discuss them, drink some wine or have a coffee date and try out a new restaurant in town! The first 3 books I read were all from The His Dark Materials series. I never got to read them when I was a kid and I really loved them! After I finished them I read the 5th book in the Percy Jackson series. I've always loved studying the history of Olympian myths and legends, and this series is just so much fun to read! Yesterday I picked up my 5th book Chelsea Handler's, Are You There Vodka? It's Me Chelsea and it was hilarious!!! I read it cover to cover in one day...although I may have stayed up a bit late to finish it! Next up is the Time Traveler's Wife, and then Angels & Demons by Dan Brown. I just love reading and its wonderful to have a story to fall asleep to at night. :)

♥ Working out is going strong. I have begun to become less enthusiastic about going to the gym, and less motivated to get ready in the morning...but i'm still going and for that I am proud of myself. I still am not seeing big number changes, but my clothes fit MUCH different and tops/skirts that I haven't been able to wear in a long time have made me so happy as I zip them up and look in the mirror to see them hitting in all of the right places! I feel amazing, I feel strong and I hope to keep seeing changes. As I run on the eliptical I picture me in my wedding gown, just at my fingertips in a smaller size and looking beautiful in a bikini on the beach. Right now I average being at the gym for 1-2 hours about 5 days a week. I'm proud of myself and have started pushing myself even harder. I'm a huge swimmer and love to swim laps. I ended up going and buying myself a swimsuit and googles last weekend and yesterday was my first day back in the pool (after doing 30 minutes of cardio on the elliptical) I swam laps for about 45 minutes and my body REALLY felt it! I was aching across my shoulders this morning when I pulled myself out of bed and I could tell it had been a long time since I had swam that hard!


♥ Kansas City has been hit hard by storms these past few weeks, along with suprisingly low temperates. In fact as I type this the dogs are cuddled up close ot me on the blanket as thunder is shaking the house and lightening is lighting up the sky! In the brief glimpses of sunlight we have had i've been heading outside to tan as much as possible and build up on my color slowly. I know closer to the wedding i'll go to a tanning bed to get a little bit darker, but I would like to not worry about burning for the wedding, or the trip to Mexico right afterward! Afternoons laying outside have been wonderful and the sun has felt amazing on my back as the dogs have frolicked around in the backyard.


♥ I've been picking up quite a bit of freelance as well with photographer and graphic design so editing photos and designing illustrations has taken up a lot of time as I make a little bit of money on the side.


♥ On the wedding front we have gotten a lot done! I've gotten schedules somewhat figured out, i've begun trying to design our invitations and I have set up a weekend to go bridesmaid shopping with my girls! I had to find a place that carried a lot because my girls get to pick out their own dresses that are in the color Merlot, and tea length. I don't want them buying dresses that they don't love and so we are all going to go out shopping and find the best dress for each of them! My cousin unfortunately can't join us since she lives in Florida (jealous!) but I think she is going to look beautiful in the styles she's chosen! I am so excited for the wedding I could just burst!


♥ We had a busy Mothers Day and spent the evening of Mothers Day at my moms house. We had a wonderful meal, and I made a special desert! Since we are all watching our weight I didn't want to make anything heavy on the calories, and remembered a Mixed-berry almond gratin I had made for Spencer's moms birthday. It's a light desert that is low in sugar (well, except for the berries) and it substitutes tofu for heavy butter and cream! It's absolutely fantastic! Especially straight from the oven with a scoop of vanilla bean ice cream! I recommend you all try it today! (If you have a food processor it literally takes 10 minutes to prep!) You can find the recipe here. I made it with fresh blueberries, blackberries and raspberries. :)


♥ Spencer and I went out to see Iron Man 2 the other night, and oh my goodness it was so fantastic! Scarlett Johanson was seriously hot in that film, and I swear I have a serious girl crush. As I munched on my gummy bears it made me want to turn tale and get my butt to the gym so I can rock a tight little body like hers! ...and her clothes throughout the film are sooo hot. I want to own them all!


♥ On the job hunt side of things I haven't had any new interviews, but I have recently applied for some great jobs! Including one with well known KC candy company, Russell Stovers! This could be a good thing....or a very very bad thing. haha! I hope I get an interview! I'm sure something will come along soon. :)

So that is my life in a nutshell lately... reading, school, working out and just plain working. I hope you all are having an amazing time right now, and enjoying whatever good weather is coming your way!!!
Now, i'm off to jump in the shower, run off to WalMart (Mia ate my contact lens case) and come home right in time to watch a little bit of Modern Family and the Middle! I just LOVE this guy!!!

♥
Jenni


Oh, and P.S. Don't forget to go here to vote for my wedding on the Dessy Facebook competition!! Right now we are in 6th place and the top 4 win prizes. :) Vote everyday, as often as possible and thank you so so so so so much!!!!!!!

Driving Ballet

While driving home last night Spencer made a comment about my driving. I don't plan ahead. I don't think about where I need to be to make the turn that it coming up in 5 minutes. I just let things happen.
It got me thinking about driving, and being at that point when you are driving along, wind in your hair and letting your mind wander to new things. That relaxing peaceful moment of just you on the open road. As cars merge in front of me, or switch lanes smoothly, weaving in and out from the other cars in line...it's like a dance.
Sometimes traffic can be irritating, and frustrating...but at some points its nice to just sit back, enjoy the ride and watch the flow of traffic dancing in front of your eyes.

haha, some of you may think I sound like a loon,
but I think it's a wonderful thing to find beauty in the everyday.
It makes life a little more interesting!
♥
Jenni

M.I.B. -Missing in Blogging

Hello everyone, and a lovely sunday evening! It seems that my life is still going 100 miles per minute and I have been struggling to find time for myself without 100 things to do! This week I....
♥ got my car inspected because I realized my plates expired. It failed the first inspection and I then had to get it fixed and re-inspected! 2 days at repair shops and 20 minutes at the DMV later I am officially licensed and on the road!
♥ Ordered wallpaper for our wedding photo wall! I have been looking for just the right pattern so that it can be mimicked on our invitations, as well as frosted onto mirror squares for our tabletops. It's been hard finding a pattern but we have some samples on the way and i'm hoping they work out as beautiful as they look online! (as a bonus we may use the same paper and wallpaper the wall behind our tv in our home!)

This is our pattern, but we will be getting it in tan-gold/ivory so it's just a subtle look.
♥ Schoolwork overload! I have a 10 page research paper, 1 page advertisement, 10 page group paper and two group presentations by the end of the month, so i've been a busy busy bee!
♥ My interview! I went to an interview last week. It lasted for almost 2 hours and was with the president of the company. The job would be an amazing opportunity and if I get called back my next interview will be to meet the team in Chicago. The competition is FIERCE, but I am honored just to be invited for an interview to such a prestigious company. If nothing else comes of it I am just excited to be considered. That being said, cross your fingers and wish me luck! I have at least a two week wait before I hear anything.
♥ Working out has been successful. I've started to see changes in my body and I love the way I have been feeling. The past 2 weeks i've taken off friday-saturday and gone every other day. In fact right now Spencer and I are planning to leave in a bit for a late sunday night sweating session :)
♥ Working on a special project for Mrs. Summer!
♥ Netflix Roku has been working overtime. Spencer and I have watched the entire series so far of Rescue Me, and just started Season 1 of The Riches. I love having a fun tv show to watch each night before bed. :)
♥ Last, but not least, I have been searching Etsy like crazy to see all of the beautiful hairpieces for my wedding. Right now theres a chance I may use my sisters headband from her wedding. However, I have started looking toward hair combs, and there are quite a few that i've really fallen in love with....

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♥ While browsing for hair accessories, I have also come across two flowers that I would really love to own. :) I think they would be perfect for wearing to the bridal shower, rehearsal dinner and everyday wear! Soooo, if anyone wants to get me an engagement present these would be great! haha just kidding!

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I hope everyone is doing amazingly well! I miss you all!!!!
♥
Jenni

A Valuable Life Lesson

It's been almost a full month since I was laid off from my very first job. While I at the time viewed it as the worst thing that could possibly have ever happened to me, I now see it as a blessing and I have never been happier than I am right now.
I defined myself by my job. I found satisfaction in the fact that I worked for a good company and that my job sounded impressive (even if it really wasn't). I would complain about the hours, the pay, the stupid rules, the dresscode and some of the corporate attitudes that surrounded me each and everyday yet I still would wake up each morning and go to work with a smile on my face content that I simply had a job.
Since leaving, I feel like I have learned more about myself every single day...
♥ I've learned that my job does not define who I am. I am defined by my actions, the things I choose to believe in and the way I feel about myself.
♥ I've learned that I am a strong person. That I have motivation and determination, and I am more than what I was doing. I've truly come full circle and i'm happier for it than I have ever been before.
♥ I've learned that I can do anything that I set my mind to. I can get great interviews with people in the industry, I can motivate myself to get to the gym and make changes in my life.
♥ I've learned that exercise releases endorphins, and endorphins make you happy!
♥ I've learned that there is nothing better than sunning myself on the deck while my dogs prance around the yard and I have a cool beverage in hand.
♥ I've learned that you can never be sad when you have a beautiful day in front of you with endless opportunities.
♥ I've learned that life is too short for wait for tomorrow. While I was at my old job I would tell myself that it was good for the moment. That I at least liked the people I worked with, and it would be fine for the next few years to stay and work hard while I worked toward my degree. I now know that I would have been stuck there for years, unhappy, as many people much younger than me were snapping up the jobs that I would have loved to do.
♥ I've learned that there is always time in the day for a snuggle.
♥ I've learned to love myself. Sure I have flaws, but never in my life have I truly enjoyed every moment of my day from waking up in the morning, exploring career opportunities that I could do, having a breakfast while catching up on my email, opening up the front door and letting the sunshine fill the room, heading out to the gym and sweating away my worries while I run through mu future in my head.

I think that life throws you unexpected curveballs and it is up to you what you choose to do with them. You can wallow and be in pain wishing for what used to be, or you can dust yourself off, step outside, and throw it right back!

I hope everyone is having an amazing day, and living life the way you want to. Don't settle just because of the security...step outside, take a chance and look at the possibilities!
♥
Jenni

God damn right, it's a beautiful day!!!

I want to shout it from the rooftops! I feel AMAZING!

I have decided that right now is an opportunity in my life. An opportunity to focus on me. My schoolwork, my life and my body. I can cook healthy meals, I can take all of my vitamins at the right time, I can drink lots of water and I can exercise! Spencer and I bought our memberships to 24 hour fitness yesterday afternoon and this morning was our first workout. All I can say is Oh My Goodness! I have never had a more amazing workout!
Prior to being laid off we would use the corporate gym at my office. It wasn't terrible, but it was small. There were 3 elipticals, 4 treadmills, 2 bikes, a stairmaster and one of those all-in-one gyms with different machines on each of the 4 sides. Many times a machine would be broken, or need to be greased up and the room was often filled with loud squeaks, groans or the sound of feet pounding away as people ran on the treadmill. I always felt pretty good after leaving the gym and would be proud of myself if my hair was a little wet from sweat and my legs felt a little tired...
Today was completely different however! I did 30 minutes on the elliptical and burned nearly 400 calories! The machines are built better, they are designed with weight-loss and hard work in mind and I know the results are going to show in no time! They also have multiple tvs and so you can choose what show to watch. I tuned my sights onto Rachel Ray and laughed along with her, and Kristie Allie her guest for the day. That woman is HILARIOUS! I then did 2 sets of 25 reps on multiple arm and leg machines. My body feels good. It's not just a feeling of accomplishment, it's a thank you from my entire body and it just is making me feel amazing!

As I worked out I imagines myself in beautiful new clothes. A beautiful little floral dress with a tight bodice and A-line skirt that I picked up for 90% at the Dillards store closing. It's a bit small right now but I knew I would be losing weight for my wedding, plus it was 90% off! I keep picturing myself wearing it to my bridal shower, or maybe even our rehearsal dinner! A cute pair of shorts with a tank top as Spencer and I explore the Farmers Market buying fresh produce. A teeny new bikini for our (cross your fingers!) honeymoon in Jamaica...and of course...my wedding gown!!! Which is going to be even more amazing and beautiful everytime I try it on! I just know it!

I feel so wonderful right now. There is just nothing that could bring me down!
I hope you are all having fabulous fridays, and amazing weekends!
♥
Jenni

PS-I will be starting Wednesday Weigh-in next week. I want to share my progress, motivate myself to keep pushing and maybe help inspire someone else along the way!

The winds are blowin!

Life has been absolutely crazy these past few weeks! It seems like everything is happening right now one after another and its hard to keep up! If I had not lost my job and been given a lot of time in my day, i'm not sure how I would be keeping up with life right now!
A few weeks ago the lovely Liz of Getting Some Fun out of Life gifted me with the fabulous "Happy 101" award!

In honor of the award I am to list 10 things that make me happy....but for a little twist i'm also going to update you on the fabulous things that have been happening in my life and the ways that i'm making lemonade from my lemons. :)


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1. I went this morning to get fitted for my wedding gown and get it ordered! I am so sorry that I can't show you pictures on here (I really don't want my fiance to stumble upon them and ruin the surprise) but I can tell you that when pictures are finally posted I think it will take everyones breath away! Trying it on this morning felt even better than the first time I tried it on. In my cousin's (who is also a bridesmaid) words the dress looks like it was made for me. Its everything I ever wanted. Simple, clean and elegant with just the right amount of decoration. A tight bodice that makes me feel regal and wonderful, and a skirt that will billow around me as I twirl. Everytime I think of my gown I can't help but smile from ear to ear and picture the moment when I walk down the aisle and take Spencer's hand in mine to become man and wife. I am simply ecstatic!


2. My mom is getting married! She had been planning to be a June bride, but complications came up and my future step-brother enlisted in the army and was going to be gone during the wedding. So now they are getting married in a week and a half! A simple ceremony at their home with close family followed by a big dinner at the Hereford House to toast the new couple! I am so excited for Tim to be my father-in-law and so thrilled to see my mom so happy!


3. I found out that Dessy, the maker of our bridesmaid dresses, also make little flats to match the dresses! I plan to buy a pair and when my feet begin to hurt from all the dancing, dining and posing of the day I will be able to slip them on for a fun beautiful addition to the day!


4. My nephew Collin turned 1 year old!!! He's getting to be such a big boy! Walking...starting to talk... he's ahead of the curve! (and a cutie to boot!)

5. I have had two interviews and both have gone well! The first was with an advertising company like I mentioned in my previous post. The second was this past monday with Garmin. It's for a production artist and was over the phone. It went great and I have a feeling I have a good shot at getting an in-person interview. I should hear from them first thing next week!

6. Spencer and I have decided to get a gym membership. We were worried about our finances but I don't do well stuck at home and i'm starting to lose my motivation to work out. We have a 24 hour fitness that is only 2 minutes from our house and has a lap pool! I am so excited to get my membership and start swimming, running and lifting! The gym I used to have at my old job was nice, but it was outdated. The equipment was old...and it was REALLY cramped. You could seriously reach out and touch a person on each side of you! It will be nice to have more options, more space and classes I can attend!


7. Mia has found a new place to hang out. Everyday as I let her outside she will at one point or another hop up on the patio rail. She seems to love it up there and looks so happy as she surveys the yard from above! (She's part cat, I swear!)

8. We have had some beautiful days lately! Sunny days, blue skies, cool breezes....and a freak snowstorm leaving 12" this past weekend that melted in 1 day! It's a perfect time to not have to go to work. To be able to go out and enjoy the beautiful day. To take a trip to the dog park, or play frisbee with the dogs in the backyard. Simply lovely.


9. I received the sweetest package in the mail this week from dear sweet Lacey of Lacey in Love . She sent me this beautiful pillow cover and the sweetest card, telling me to hang in there and that good things were going to come my way! Th photo DEFINITLY doesn't do it justice, and once I get a pillow to slip into it I will take a better photo! Thank you so much Lacey, you truly brightened my day and made me realize how lucky I am to be connected to so many jaw-droppingly amazing women through this blogging network. I am amazed and humbled by your kind heart, sweet words and endearing gesture.

10. Life is looking up. Each day I find new jobs I want to apply for, I have new amazing things happen and I feel a little more confident that everything is going to work out. Thank you so much for everyone who has stood by me through this difficult time. I wish I had more moments in the day to read your blogs and leave such amazing comments as the ones I have received. I can not thank you enough. You are all amazing in my eyes!

♥
Jenni

The sun is shining.

Through it all, things are looking up.
I know my posts have been sporadic, but my life lately has been centered around nurturing myself and preparing for the next steps in my lifes journey. In addition we had a sorrowful event happen with the death of my stepmother (may she rest in peace) and I have been devoting a large portion of my time to thinking about my father and praying that he will get through all of this ok. Yesterday was this birthday and so I made a lovely dinner for him, my step-sister and her daughter/my niece. We had an absolutely wonderful evening. I made these wonderful bacon-wrapped meatloves. Recipe courtesy of Spencer's sister. :)

and served it with slow-cooked green beans that I simmered in the crockpot all day, baked potatoes and Velveeta macaroni and cheese! My dad seemed to really enjoy himself and it was nice to see him. Mia LOVED him and was all dog smiles as she ran around him in circles stopping for licks, pets and love. Betty on the other hand was a bit of a jerk and wouldn't stop barking! We had to put her in the backyard and let her wear herself out.

♥ The rest of the week i've been working hard to get my portfolio into shape. When I got laid off I wasn't prepared. No resume, no cover letter, no portfolio.... so it's been a scramble ever since and has been monopolizing all of my time. A lot of my work was still on my computer at work and so I had nothing to put into a portfolio. Cristin, my pal from my old job, has gone above and beyond providing me with my files so I could have something to show. I owe her more than I can ever say! Thank you so so so much Cristin! I miss you!!!! Everyone should go visit her and give her some love. Her workload doubled with my layoff. Poor thing.


♥ Today I had an interview with a wonderful little advertising company. I met with the Creative Director and he gave me some wonderful information and tips. They aren't hiring right at this moment, but that could always change soon and he urged me to stay in touch in case a position does open up! He said that with my background in photography, graphic design and marketing skills i'm acquiring I am creating a nice little package for myself. He also gave me insight to look at smaller companies because in a smaller firm everyone has to wear multiple hats and with my collection of talents I would fit in perfectly. Now I have some ideas of things to add to my portfolio and a direction. It was nice to hear that i'm on the right path and that I have some real talent.


♥ Over the last 2 weeks i've lost 6 lbs. I don't know wether i'm stressed and it's causing me to lose weight or what....but either way, unemployment at least brought me something good! The strange thing is that I haven't been exercising since the layoff. My gym was at my work, so I lost my gym and don't have a place to go. So I've been trying to figure out ways to do it at home, but its been a little cold so i've been confined to stay inside.Today I went ahead and did the 30-day shred....level 2.... All I can say is "OH MY GOODNESS! I have done level 1 a lot....and I even follow the girl that does it full out rather than the girl who does the low impact version....and I am not in horrible shape right now but that thing kicked me in the butt! It was so hard and I was just completely exhausted by the time that I got done! I had to just keep walking around drinking water as my face slowly returned to a normal color and my body stopped shaking. Sooo I guess tomorrow will be day 2!


♥ Friday is the big day! We are going shopping for my wedding gown! I am so excited and I just can't wait to find the right dress! I know I want something that has a little bit of a fitted corset with a fuller skirt. Maybe strapless. I also want the overlay to be satin and not tulle so it weighs down the poofiness a bit and gives it a sophisticated edge. I am just so excited to try on those beautiful gowns and find the one that is perfect for me!!!


♥ We went over and visited Sarah last week and she had the most delicious cupcakes ever for us to try! They were a day old, but still moist and perfect with thick creamy icing! Sooo good! We decided that they will be the base for our two chocolate wedding cakes! The surprising part? They were Vegan! Vegan Chocolate Ginger Orange to be exact. I am just so shocked at how tasty they are! If anyone attempts the recipe remember to use a big bowl! Sarah said she was scared her bowl was going to overflow as the cupcake goodness kept rising!

So that has been what has been going on in my life, and why I have been absent for awhile. I will start reading all of your blogs again soon! I've just been so busy lately that time has gotten away from me. So please, if something exciting has happened leave me a note! Let me know! I'm dying to hear from all of you!

♥
Jenni

This too shall pass

I am completely in awe and amazed by all of the women who read this blog. For the past week I have received encouraging emails, comments and kind thoughts from women across the world. You have all inspired me in some small way and reminded me to keep pushing, To keep believing and to stay strong. Thank You.

This is definitely one of the harder things I have gone through in a long time. Last week I came home from class, and was just sad. I walked up to Spencer, I hugged him and I said, "I have no purpose. I have no reason to get out of bed... I need a purpose" Spencer hugged me and told me he would be my purpose. I told him that it wouldn't work because he made me want to stay in bed and cuddle with him...so he said he would be my porpoise. He'd be cute and make me giggle. He is my porpoise.

I took a week away from this blog. I needed the time to gather my thoughts, to prepare my resume and to begin the search for a new job. So far I have sent out around 25-30 applications. Some of them I fit the qualifications for perfectly and some are a bit more of a stretch but I don't see the point in not trying. As Spencer's sister so eloquently put it I'm "so positive that rainbows could fly out of my ass in a hurricane". Pretty vivid imagery, but I don't see the point in not reaching out and pushing my own potential.

Life has hit me down many times, and each time I tell myself that things could never be worse. That the world is ending, and my life has officially gone down the crapper... but each time I persevere and in the end everything works out better than I imagined it could. I know that this time it will be the same.

I've decided i'm going to use my time off for myself... I want to accomplish many thing...

♥ I want to keep exercising. I took the last week off, but I plan to jump right back in today. There is no point in sitting on my butt and putting all of my hard work to shame.
♥ I am going to work ahead and finish all of my schoolwork early. Get a jumpstart on the semester and pour my heart into it to get my well deserved A.
♥ I
want to read all of the books i've been putting off. Angels & Demons, the Time Traveler's Wife, the His Dark Materials series.... I want to read.
♥ I want to run the dogs. Play with them. Train them.
♥ I want to lay outside in the sun and enjoy the coming spring days.
♥ I want to prepare wonderful and healthy lunches for myself. To love the ingrediants, to savor the smells.
♥ I want to dance. I want to be happy. I want to run.

All of these things are going to be possible. All of these things are going to happen.

Things are looking up. Just this morning I won the beautiful Kelly Moore Camera Bag from the Brightside Project. Now I just need to choose my color!

fuschia?

or grey?

This is the perfect sign of great things coming.
♥

Jenni