June 2, 2010

Carpe Diem and loving life!

1... 2... 3...
The one thing that I have learned from this past weekend
is how much all of the little things don't matter.
I've been stressing myself out lately
thinking about my friends...new and old.
Stressing over how I have lost touch with some
and thinking maybe I did something wrong.
My close friends have recently told me i'm "so nice"
and sweet and wouldn't harm a fly...how I am an inspiration...
but everytime I heard it, I would doubt myself. 
I would thank them for their kind words, 
and in the back of my head I would scoff at the remarks
and not be able to believe the words that they said are true.

Overall i've been down
and all of it has been sitting in my head and making me miserable.
Friends I lost, words that were said, actions that were made...
but ever since last Thursday night, none of that has mattered.

I have never been more content
Those people that have hurt me, I am finally ready to let go of
I know that in the past things happen than we can't change
but I shouldn't be focusing on it 4 years later
worried about what they still think of me.
What does it matter?
Why should I care?

This is a time in my life to worry about myself.
To get healthy, to grow, to make friends and expand my wings.
To try out new things, like books and recipes and activites.
To make a healthy change in my life
and finally fully focus on working out AND eating healthy
not just working out, and then coming home to fried food and ice cream....
or both in one with some fried ice cream!

If my little Mia,
can come back from the cusp of death
To win the battle for her life, when the doctors couldn't even find out what was wrong.
To do all of that in only 3 days time,
and on the 4th day come home to run outside
breath in the fresh air, chase the birds, run after the squirrels
and wag her tail in the sunshine...
I can finally turn my life around.

I can lose the weight.
I can feel beautiful again.
I can focus on my studies and keep pulling my grades up (3.75 so far)
I can read a new book
I can learn a new trick
and I can let go of the past
Embrace my friendships
Love my family
Adore every moment with my amazing fiance
Fall in love more each and every single day.

I am a nice person.
I am a creative person.
I am a catch.

And that is my new personal mantra.
A sign to say to myself each day.
A message to let yesterday roll off
and embrace today with my head held high.
Last night, I ordered a new book called  
Naturally Thin: unleash Your SkinnyGirl
by Bethenny Frankel.
 I realize she may not be the guru of being healthy,
but i'm looking to the book for possible positive changes
small things I can do to make everything a little easier.
It came highly recommended from another blogger
(sorry I can't remember where I read it, if it was you THANK YOU!)
Im hoping it will be just that extra push I need...
and when i'm done reading it,
I may just pass it on so that it can bring some insight into one of your lives as well!

I am hoping to hear back about the interview 
I went on a week of so ago any day now.
Keep your fingers crossed for me.
But if it doesn't work out, I know another job will come along.
A positive attitude can move mountains.
This will pass and I will have an amazing career.
the perfect addition to my already amazing family and home.

Here's to today, tomorrow and the day after!

PS- Last day to enter the giveaway! Enter by 7 p.m. central time tonight!


Davanie said...

I thought I would share a book that I totally dig. It has an completely cheese-fest name "Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life" - written by Wayne Dyer, but it has helped me start to believe when people say things to me like "you're talented, smart, etc". I'm still a work in progress, but it was like a swift kick in the pants. And has made me see the spiritual side of myself - something I've been completely lacking my whole life. Anyway, good luck on your journey! I think you're right, 'A positive attitude can move mountains'!

Rasha said...

LOVe your positivity hunny!

Meghan said...

Oh girl, I know exactly what you mean about friends - as we get older, our priorities shift and people grow apart. I know I have distanced myself from friends simply to get away from their negativity. I think it's totally natural. Anyway, I love that you are turning all of it into something positive, and I admire your optimism! You are an inspiration, lady!

And I love Bethenny to pieces! I've heard nothing but good things about her book!

CK said...

I think its wedding planning but I myself have been feeling a lot like you lately especially with the friends situation. Its amazing how friendships can change so fast. This post put a smile on my face. You have a wonderful attitude and it makes me want to stop worrying and fix mine:)

Poppies and Sunshine said...

Great to hear someone's positive and uplifting approach to everything :) Glad you're doing well!

Belen said...

Jenni baby! Can I just say I love this post?! I love the reflection and the positivity at the end.

I can honestly say I'm so glad the blog world has introduced me to you. You are fantastic in every way, and I am SOOOO rootin' for you and this interview! You will rock it. We'll both rock these interviews and both get these jobs and rule. :D

And just to prove how amazing I think you are, I've tagged you here:


and have given you the Life is Good award here:


Love love love ya! :D

Selma said...

Love this post girl, and the positivity you share! I need some of that. :)

Thanks for sharing.


chelsea rebecca said...

aw yes you CAN DO IT!!!
and i've heard that bethenny's book really works.
wishing you the best of luck!! your positivity is incredible!!

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

love this! amazing reminder to enjoy the life we have- cheers lady!

Carol {Everyday Delights} said...

I've been so behind on blogging! So this is a way late read on this post. But I can TOTALLY relate to this post. I got to thinking about the same stuff when I was making my guest list for the wedding.